Wait a minute Solomon, Christians do not talk about sex and we do not celebrate it. It is dirty! Says who?
The Bible celebrates sex and sexuality in many more ways than is commonly known. The devil did not create sex! God did! Sex is not unclean!
When we realise and accept the fact that sex is a beautiful creation of God, which He designed to gender spiritual, emotional and physical oneness, grace, strength and loveliness between a couple in the context of a marriage relationship, it becomes easy to understand its importance, and joyfully so.
MARRIAGE is honourable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge -Hebrews 13:4, NKJV.
Marriage is not a “necessary evil” and sex is good, in fact, it is awesome. Marriage is honourable. Quote me on this one.
Solomon, you talk like this, perhaps you have not experienced challenges in your marriage.
Really! I have had a very challenging marriage that ended in divorce court. I am not proud of it, and it remains one of the most painful memories I have. And I do not wish it for anyone. Nevertheless, do I believe that God designed it to be that way? It shouldn’t be!
Now, let’s talk about sex.
If everything in your marriage has gone south and sex has been reduced to, “Woman, I want it!” “Oh… come and do!” something is wrong somewhere. I know it can be better. You do not have to pine away in your “family secret.” You can get help.
Dr Helen Pensanti, in her book Better Sex for You, says, “Sex is meant to be mutually pleasurable to a husband and wife. God designed sex as the means by which a husband and a wife, transported by the bliss of their expressed physical love for one another, literally become one flesh. The miracle of oneness, encompassing not only a physical but also an indescribable spiritual joining, may represent the pinnacle of human pleasure. Such glorious physical pleasure celebrates the uniting of two people. It is the cornerstone of a good marriage.”
In Hebrews 13:4, the Greek word translated ‘bed’ is ‘koite’, from which the English word ‘coitus’ is derived. If I am permitted to paraphrase this verse I would read: ‘Only in marriage, which is honourable, is sex beautiful and clean. But outside of that commitment, sexual practice as in fornication and adultery is morally flawed and sinful. Therefore, God will judge those who engage in such practices.’
Let me note here that the original words translated ‘fornication’ in the Bible involve sex between unmarried partners and all forms of sexual perversion: homosexuality, heterosexuality, bestiality, orgies, pornography, adultery which is when a married person has sex with someone he or she is not married to, and such like.
Solomon, you are out of touch with reality. We are in modern times- the information age, for crying out loud! This is AD 2019, not 2019 BC. The sexual revolution is real. As long as there two consenting adults, nobody is hurt. Shouldn’t we satisfy the libido which God himself gave to us?
Let us face it, illicit sex accounts for high levels of distrust between spouses who were having sex before marriage, also a large number of curable and incurable diseases are linked to sexual transmission.
Beyond the fact that sex outside of marriage offends God, sexual sin is the only sin the Bible says one commits against his own body.
Your body is God’s dwelling place (1Corinthians 3:16). Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body -1 Corinthians 6:18, NKJV. So much for, “no one is hurt!” If you feel you are not hurt by sin, God, your maker is. He knows that sin destroys. His love for you wants to protect you from destruction.
When a manufacturer designs a product, it is he that determines its purpose and how it is may be used, and not the user. To that end, he gives instructions in a document called a manual. Once he determines its use, then any other use of the product may be regarded as abuse.
If we concede that God made sex and that He has determined that its proper use is within the context of marriage, is it out of place for us to agree with His word (manual) that every contrary use or expression of sex is abuse?
Meanwhile, there is nothing new or modern about the ‘sexual revolution.’ The author of The New Morality said, ‘The new morality is nothing but the old immorality.’
At the height of the Roman Empire (the Romans invented the condom), sexual pleasure and perversion became one of the cornerstones of its society and a major contributor to its collapse. This also happened to some civilizations before it.
Let us examine this little bit. One of the controversies that greeted Paul’s visit to Ephesus was regarding the goddess Diana whose image, it was claimed, fell from Jupiter.
In the temple of this goddess were about a thousand male and female prostitutes. Sexual orgies were part and parcel of its system of worship. And one could participate by personally having sex or watching sexual activity going on. It was live pornography (See Acts 19).
Going back further to the period of Abraham up to Moses, the Canaanites and other occupants of Canaan had so perfected sexual perversion that for a woman to dress as a man and a man as a woman was a basic homosexual element of their social and religious culture. Because of this and other perverse sexual practices (see Leviticus 18), God instructed the Israelites that a woman must not put on a man’s apparel or a man put on a woman’s apparel. For the land is defiled; therefore I visit the punishment of its iniquity upon it, and the land vomits out its inhabitants -Lev. 18:25, NKJV.
I have given these examples to illustrate that there is nothing modern about the so-called ‘sexual revolution.’
Now, Helen Pensanti also tells us some of the benefits of sex in marriage: Good sex builds a firm marriage; Sex creates a joyful attitude; Regular sexual intercourse improves health; Sex also helps to lengthen one’s life.
Now, on the issue of a joyful attitude, I once read a statistic, that men who are happy in their marriages, on the average earn higher incomes than those who are not. This is no kidding!
Are you married? Sex is vital to the health of your marriage, do not deprive or use sex as a means to ‘punish’ your spouse, instead work towards giving your spouse the best of you and bring joy to your marriage (1 Corinthians 7:3-5).
Satan knows the importance of good sex and the danger of wrong sex so he tempts couples to have sex before marriage and tries to keep them from it when they are married. What a destructive tactic!
Well, ‘experience’ is not the best teacher, God’s word is; and obedience and the practice of His word is the best experience.
I pray that not only will married and unmarried believers keep themselves pure from sexual sin but also that God would bless our marriages with great sex. And everybody said… Amen!
- Would you like to begin a relationship with Jesus Christ? If so I would be delighted to hear from you.
Thank you. Do not forget to keep living, loving and learning.
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