Do you know the Joneses? They moved in next door last week. No… The Joneses have always lived in your neighbourhood!
Who are the Joneses anyway? The Joneses live next door, they are in the church you attend, and they work in the same office as you. The Joneses run the same kind of business that you run and are in the same exclusive social or sports club of which you are a member. They are in ministry just like you are.
The Oxford Dictionary describes the Joneses as “a person’s neighbours or social equals. Chiefly in keep up with the Joneses, try to emulate or not to be outdone by one’s neighbours”.
The Joneses living in our residential, social or economic neighbourhood is not a problem. The problem lies in our struggle to keep up with them. Trying to impress them with the latest this and the finest that… It is in our doing everything possible to surpass or not to be outdone by them. The book “My Mercedes Benz is Bigger than Yours,” written by Nkem Nwankwo, captures the spirit. In Nigeria, we say in Pidgin English, “I better pass my neighbour!”
If there is any time people seek to outdo one another or to make an impression, it is in the Christmas season. As the “Ember” months kick-in, their minds begin to race. They want to buy clothes to out-class the Joneses. The designer “gele” (head-tie) must be “to match” with the Sample-lace Buba and Iro (a Yoruba traditional attire). Mrs Jones must bow!
Now before sisters crucify me… It is just the perfect time to join the men at the Rayfield Golf Club (let’s separate the men from the boys), or to change your car to the latest edition, “I need to let them know I can also afford a Baby-Benz”. Oh, sorry, that is too small… a G-Class SUV! That’s better, and for your information “tear–leather” (brand new).
Wait a minute Solomon; you are not against one getting the good things of life, are you? No sir! Some of these things are not necessarily luxuries, some do make life easier, more efficient and to a large extent, they can help expand a person’s productivity levels. A good car can save one’s life on account of its extra safety options.
But what we are looking at here is ‘why?’ Is the reason you want these things just to put up an appearance even if you can afford it? Most times though, people barely afford these ego trips. In reality, the Joneses care-less about what you have or your appearances. Honey, they are not impressed! They would pretend to be, but they are not.
Anytime you purchase or acquire something solely motivated by the desire to keep up with another person’s socioeconomic status; to demonstrate that you are competent, or that you “belong”, you actually mortgage a part of your identity and God-given uniqueness.
The comparison-game, the rat-race gradually becomes the driving force of your life. Paul makes it clear that those who engage in “comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise” (2 Cor. 10:12). Doing things simply to impress others is a malady you need not subject yourself to.
Where do you get your sense of self-worth? Is it from the things you own, the position you occupy or the people you know? If you measure your self-worth by the kind of neighbourhood you live in, the car you drive, or the size of your bank account, desirable as these things could be, you are infinitely underestimating the value God places on you. You don’t know who you are! This may also be true of you if you have low self-esteem because of a lack of these things. This is a fundamental issue.
We all know that the meaning of ‘Christmas’ is the “Celebration of Christ.” Now, let’s go a bit further. It is also a celebration of what He came to do for humanity. If there is anything we learn from what Jesus Christ did, it is the value God places on the human person: people are infinitely priceless! He valued us with His blood: His very own life.
In celebrating Christ this Christmas, instead of comparing your life with the Joneses and spending a fortune to measure up with them, you could be a blessing to someone else. Seek out a family or someone less-privileged than you are, give them some of your best clothes or even buy them new ones. If you can afford it, get together with some friends and give an orphanage a Christmas feast! Light a Christmas candle in someone’s darkness this year! And have some fun!
Sometime during this Christmas season, one of the things you would want do is to take stock of the outgoing year. Take a look at how well you have done in your own life. Evaluate your relationships- those with your spouse, your children and other important people in your life. These and your personal relationship with God (I am assuming that you have a relationship with Him), are they getting better or worse or have they remained stagnant?
Evaluate your business or your performance at work. Did you make a profit? Could your clients have been treated better? See what you did right, what you did wrong, and then prayerfully plan how you can do better in the coming year. This venture will do you better good than having a ‘class-contest’ with the Joneses.
Also, you must evaluate how you see yourself. Take a good look at the mirror. Ask the person you see, “Hey, how much are you worth?” If indeed you deem that you are “complete in Christ” (Col. 2:10), you would not feel pressured to measure up. You will not be driven by the fear of not “meeting up.” You might want to tell the person in the mirror, “Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows” (Lk. 12:6-7).
In a chat with a brilliant National Youth Service Corps member who was about to end his Service Year and was seeking a job, he asked me “What do you do for a living?” I told him what I did and then added, “It’s not so much as to what one does for a living as to what it is one is living for.”
If all you live for is to keep up with the Joneses, then there is not much to your life. You might be in the process of gaining the whole world at the expense of your soul. To this, we can ask a poignant question Jesus asks, “And how do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your soul in the process? Is anything worth more than your soul?” (Mk. 8:36-37, NLT). Your soul is infinitely priceless. Don’t lose it.
What would you do about Christ this Christmas season? After all, Christmas is about celebrating Christ. Think about it!
I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and a Brilliant New Year!!!
Thank you. Do not forget to keep living, loving and learning.
